Effective Ways to Help Someone with Depression: A Guide for Loved Ones
Seeing a close friend or family member struggling can be painful. Not knowing what they’re going through or how to help can amplify how you’re feeling.
When someone is diagnosed with depression, they can go through a wide range of emotions and actions. In some cases, it can be hard to explain how they’re feeling or what they need from those closest to them.
Here is a guide for what depression is, some common signs and symptoms, and how to help a loved one who’s been diagnosed with depression.
What Is Depression?
Depression is a mood disorder that causes severe symptoms. These symptoms commonly affects a person's thoughts, feelings, and the way in which they handle everyday tasks and activities including eating, sleeping, and working.
Depression Symptoms
It’s important to understand that symptoms will vary from person to person and in some cases day to day. Oftentimes, the symptoms below will last for two or more weeks.
Physical
Having trouble falling or staying asleep
Sleeping too much or more than usual
New or worsening body aches and pains including headaches or back pains
Attempting suicide or self-harm
Noticeable weight loss or weight gain
Emotional
Feeling hopeless, worthless, empty, or sad regularly
Talking about not wanting to live or having suicidal thoughts
Having little or no interest in activities or hobbies previously enjoyed
Being irritable or frustrated by small situations
Struggles concentrating, thinking, or making decisions
Ruminating on past failures (both real or perceived)
Overly tired or lack of energy
How to Help
Once you’re aware of a loved one struggling with depression, it’s normal to want to try and help them through how they’re feeling. Below are tips and effective ways to help someone with depression.
Talk to Them
If you notice a shift in behavior by someone you’re close to, try to talk to them. Start a conversation with them and share any concerns.
It’s important to ask questions but also avoid them coming across as judgmental. When possible, try to have these conversations in person and avoid offering opinions or talking over them. Sample questions include the following:
How are you feeling about things? I know you mentioned going through tough times as of late.
Recently, you’ve seemed upset. Is there something going on or anything I can help with?
Encourage Them to Seek Treatment
Sometimes starting therapy or talking to a therapist can be scary or intimidating. Try to encourage your loved one to speak to a professional to help them manage and treat their depression. If they’re already talking to a therapist, encourage them to continue the process.
Set Healthy Boundaries
It’s common for someone with mental health issues to depend on others or even one specific person. Sometimes, this can lead to them calling and texting at all hours of the day and night. While you want to encourage them to reach out, you also want to set and maintain boundaries.
This could include saying you’re free during certain hours, or you’re free at a specific time each week to connect. If you’re concerned about them lashing out, you can create a plan or have a code word for them to text if they’re truly struggling and waiting to talk isn’t an option.
Avoid Taking Things Personally
This can be easier said than done, but it’s important to try to not take things your loved one says personally. Remember, their depression isn’t your fault, and it’s not their fault. Sometimes they will lash out in anger or frustration which can lead to you needing a break or space from them. And that’s okay. If you’re feeling emotionally or physically drained, it’s okay to take breaks for the sake of your mental health.
If you or someone you know is struggling with depression, depression therapy can help. Please reach out today to learn more.